Back to 115. God I almost wish I were still sick. Seeing 109.4 was maybe the greatest feeling in the world. I am determined to get back there. Its becoming very clear to me that 115 is the weight at which my body is most comfortable, naturally. So now it's time to push it past that comfort zone. I'm reading Portia de Rossi's new book Unbearable Lightness. It's a good motivational read. I can relate to a lot of the neurotic thoughts she writes about. I'm going to consistently use my new food journal. Every calorie will be counted and logged in that book. I'm hoping this will make me fee a stronger sense of accountability. I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow. Class till 12 and then I meet with a councilor at 2 to discuss uc applications and some other questions about transferring. Between 12 and 2 I'm going to write my critiques for philosophy, and then after my appointment at 2 I have to work at 4:30 till 7:30. Then it's back home to start my personal statement and maybe study for my impending statistics test on thursday. Applications are due on the 30 of this month and I am stressing out. I feel like I'm so busy lately, it's a miracle I find time to stuff my face with food. Imagine all the things I could be doing with the time that I'm busy consuming mass quantities of calories!! The rest of my week will be as busy as tomorrow. I have a math test and a final draft of a paper due on Thursday. Jimmy is coming home Thursday for a week or so. I'm pretty excited, yet very cautious. We have been communicating much more recently, lots of "I love you's" and " I miss you's" have been exchanged. We will see what happens.... I'm just hoping I can stay busy enough till then to lose at least a pound or two!
Thin thin thin thin.