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I am 109.4 this morning. Ive been pretty sick the last few days,…

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I am 109.4 this morning. Ive been pretty sick the last few days, haven't been eating much. What I did eat last night I purged. I love the feeling when everything is out. When all the food is no longer bloating you and clogging the shit out of your arteries. I am very sick, in the body and in the head. This disorder is beginning to take over. I don't know if I'm scared. I don't have many feelings lately. I just want to be 105. Thats only four pounds away. However, I am beginning to realize that even then, the number on the scale won't be good enough. I don't want this to eat my soul. 109.4. Wow.
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